Eventually, however, I decided I couldn't only read conspiracy theorists anymore. I had to at least look at the claims of the opposition in detail, to see if I could refute their arguments and to see if maybe possibly I might be mistaken. Before that I was afraid of doing that, fearing that I might be sucked into being a government dupe again.
Same here. As mentioned earlier on this blog, the main aspect of 9/11 Truth that always did it for me was the fact that no one seemed to challenge the conspiracy theories, and those who did were only relying upon personal attacks. Or, so it seemed.
I've been pondering why I never sought out the opposition's claims, but I couldn't organize it into a logical thought like you have. I was afraid! Being a trustful person(and perhaps naive, at times), I've always felt I was prone to accepting things blindly as facts from people whom I felt were trustworthy sources. Now I know for sure: I was afraid of being "sucked into being a government dupe again," in your words.
When I looked carefully at the conspiracy debunking sites, they made a lot of sense. I couldn't refute their arguments after all. And it seemed so much more plausible, once I actually saw that the "holes" in the official story weren't what I thought they were. Looking back, it seems absolutely crazy that I could have bought it hook, line and sinker like I did. I try to be skeptical and to not let my emotions get in the way of analyzing the facts wherever possible, but apparently I failed at that. Luckily I got better and with a dose of rationality I've been cured of the conspiracy delusion.
I went through a very similar process, myself. Doesn't it annoy you how the truthers are now claiming that you're some type of disinfo agent, or that you formulate your opinion based solely on movies?
What also helped was quitting pot. I don't know if the same goes for you, but my personal observation is that most truthers are total potheads. A different breed than your typical pothead-- they can remain somewhat coherent and actually engage in activity if compelled enough. They think that they have a rare ability to work through their highs, and in some cases it's true. Unfortunately for them, they neglect to realize the effects that chronic pot-smoking has on reasoning, critical thinking, and outright paranoid delusions.
All in all, kudos, Diagoras. Ex-Truther is not just about Mikey Metz, it's a growing phenomenon, so feel free to express your opinions here. You are more than welcome to.